THE CRAVING TRAP

wellness

Have you ever opened the fridge, stared at everything inside and thought, “I’m hungry… but I don’t actually know what I want”? So, you grab something - maybe it’s a biscuit with your tea, a few chips or some chocolate. You eat it, feel satisfied for a little while and then, somehow, you’re looking for something else half an hour later. Sound familiar?

After 14 years of working as a wellness coach and nutritionist, I’ve had countless conversations with people who say to me, “I don’t understand what’s wrong with me. I’m not even that hungry, but I keep wanting something.”

And very often, nothing is ‘wrong’ with them. They may not have a willpower problem. They may not need another strict diet. Sometimes, they’re tired. Stressed. Bored. Procrastinating. Looking for comfort. And sometimes, they’ve simply trained their brains to expect food at certain times of the day.

That is very different from physical hunger, which usually builds gradually. You might notice your stomach rumbling. Your energy may start to dip. You may find it harder to concentrate. Eventually, you start thinking about having a proper meal.

And here’s an important clue: when you’re genuinely hungry, you’re usually open to different foods. If I put chicken, rice and vegetables in front of you when you’re genuinely hungry, you’re unlikely to think, “No, I need chocolate or nothing.”

However, habitual eating often feels different. It can appear suddenly and come with a very specific craving: “I need something sweet.” “I really want chips.” “I need something with my tea.” That craving may not be your body asking for food. It may be your brain asking for something familiar. Your tea may not need a biscuit.

One of the most interesting things I’ve noticed in my work is how often eating becomes attached to everyday routines: tea means biscuits; watching television means snacks; working late means ordering food; getting into the car means coffee and something sweet; finishing dinner means dessert. The body may not actually need food at these moments. The brain has simply learnt, “This is what we do now.”

Repeat something often enough and it starts happening automatically. You may walk into the kitchen, open the cupboard and reach for the biscuits before you’ve even consciously decided you want them. That’s habitual eating. And telling yourself, “I just need more discipline,” usually doesn’t solve it. First, you have to notice the habit.

Then there’s emotional eating

This one is a little more complicated because food can genuinely make us feel good. A difficult day at work can make chocolate seem irresistible; a stressful evening can make takeaway feel like the easiest option; a lonely weekend can turn into hours of mindless snacking.

And sometimes food becomes a reward, “I’ve had such a difficult day. I deserve this.”

There is absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying food. The problem begins when food becomes your main way of dealing with emotions.

Think about the cycle: Stress craving food temporary relief. The more often you repeat that cycle, the stronger the connection becomes.

And eventually, you may find yourself reaching for food whenever you feel stressed, even before you realise what you’re feeling.

But why does stress make us want food?

Because food is an easy source of comfort. When we’re emotionally drained, we naturally look for something that feels good and requires very little effort. Food is available. It’s familiar. And it can provide an immediate sense of pleasure.

But there’s a catch: the chocolate doesn’t remove the stress; the chips don’t solve the boredom; the takeaway doesn’t fix the difficult conversation you had at work. The relief is temporary because you weren’t actually trying to satisfy hunger. You were trying to soothe a feeling.

And that’s why emotional eating can leave people feeling frustrated or guilty afterwards. Recognising emotional eating does not mean you should never eat when you’re emotional.

We’re human. Sometimes you’ll have chocolate or dessert because you’re celebrating; sometimes you’ll eat popcorn simply because it’s enjoyable. That’s normal. The point is to make sure food isn’t your only coping mechanism.

Over the years, I’ve learnt that looking only at the food often means missing the real story.

Instead of asking, “Why did I eat that?” sometimes we need to ask, “What was happening before I ate it?” Was I exhausted or stressed? Did I eat very little throughout the day? The real story may have started hours earlier.

This is one reason I don’t believe every eating challenge can be solved by giving someone another diet plan. Sometimes, a person doesn’t need another list of foods to avoid. They need to understand why they are reaching for food in the first place.

Your environment matters too

Let’s be honest. It’s much harder to eat mindfully when biscuits, chocolates and crisps are sitting on the kitchen counter. If you walk past them ten times a day, your brain is constantly being reminded that they’re there.

Your routines matter too. If you always eat while watching television or scrolling through your phone, you may eventually stop noticing how much you’re eating.

Try making eating a little more intentional: sit down, put the food on a plate, don’t eat directly from the packet, step away from the kitchen counter and slow down enough to actually taste what you’re eating. These sound like tiny changes, but sometimes tiny changes are exactly what we need.

And sometimes… you’re simply hungry. This is equally important. If you’re constantly hungry between meals, don’t automatically label yourself an emotional eater.

Look at your meals: Are they filling enough? Are you getting enough protein and fibre?

Are you restricting your food too much? Are you sleeping well?

Someone who eats very little throughout the day and becomes ravenous at night may not have a willpower problem. They may simply be under-eating.

Understanding your body is far more useful than blindly following food rules.

Start noticing, not judging

You don’t need to analyse every bite you eat. Just start noticing your patterns.

The next time you suddenly find yourself reaching for food, pause for a moment. Take a breath and ask yourself:

“Am I physically hungry or am I looking for something else?” If you’re hungry, eat.

If you’re stressed, perhaps give yourself a few minutes to deal with the stress. If you’re bored, change your environment. If you’re tired, maybe what you really need is rest.

And if you still want the chocolate afterwards? Have it. Enjoy it. Eat it without guilt.

Because wellness isn’t about becoming afraid of food or controlling every craving. It’s about understanding your relationship with food.

After 14 years in this field, this is one lesson I keep coming back to: food isn’t always the problem. Sometimes, it’s simply the messenger.

When we learn to listen to our hunger, cravings and eating habits instead of constantly fighting them, we can begin to understand what our bodies - and sometimes our emotions - are really trying to tell us.

Zainab Sarwar is a wellness coach & nutritionist. Instagram: Lifestylebyzainabsarwar Website: www.yogadubai.ae Email: [email protected]